5 Reasons Why Valentine’s Day Should Not be a Holiday

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I was telling my honey the other day, (ie: weeks ago) that I hated Valentine’s Day.  He sort of sounded incredulous, when he asked, “Really?”  On past Valentine’s Days I had to assure people that I was not ridiculing this “Day of Love,” from a single person’s bitter heart.  This year, I  have a chance to assure people that my disliking of this “Day of Love” is not due singleness.   It is truly just a dislike for a “holiday,” that I believe,  never should have taken up calendar space in the first place.

Not wanting to post something that would end with foot in mouth syndrome, I researched the roots of this flowery, pink and red holiday.  I discovered something rather hopeful.  But before I relay what I discovered, I want to reference a conversation I recently had with my sister.   I was once again divulging my distain for this holiday, “If people want to celebrate a holiday of love, they should look to Christmas or Easter.  Those, more than a day of hearts and chocolates, express the true nature of love.  The death and birth of Christ.”

And to my surprise, true love, is why Valentine’s Day was started centuries ago.  To honor and commemorate the lives of martyrs who had died because of their loving and giving natures.  One such martyr was St. Valentine (well actually in the end there were dozens of these “St. Valentines.”)  One in particular, was killed for overseeing the marriage of soldiers who were forbidden to marry.   He also ministered to persecuted Christians during the Roman empire.  The list went on and on of Saints, many named Valentine, who were commemorated on this day.

It was not until Chaucer, in the 14th century, that Valentine’s Day was associated with romantic love.  And who can blame a writer and poet, for promoting romance?  I mean he did live in one of the most “romantic” eras in history.  But as we have lost our sense of romance in this century, this “holiday” has become something otherly.   Valentine’s has become an excuse ridden “holiday”, for companies to turn a profit.  A day to exploit human emotions and their pocket books.   It is time to call Valentine’s Day what it really is: “National Day of Creating Feelings of Guilt or Unloveableness:  Just so We Can Make Money.”  Because if we are honest, we know this day is not really about celebrating true and lasting love.  Valentine’s is about promoting the love of money.

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So in light of my opinion (yes I know this is all opinion), I have created/compiled a list of why Valentine’s Day should no longer be a “holiday.”

Reason #5.   It’s hard enough being single, without a holiday that  promotes feelings of aloneness.  If Valentine’s was truly a day of “love,” it would promote more than just “romantic” love. Shallow romantic love at that.

Reason #4.  Men should not need to be reminded, from the Day after New Years, that there is a day approaching in which they should remember to tell their “significant others” that they love them.  (Love is all year round)

Reason #3.  Valentine’s Day undermines true love, by giving the impression that giving gifts, buying flowers, or writing sappy words represents true and lasting love.  The kind of love that lasts 50+ years.

Reason #2.  Because when someone has 2 months of reminders that their expression of love is “mandatory” and they still forget dot, dot, dot…

AND the number one reason Valentine’s Day should be either A.) Redefined, or B) stricken from the calendar…

Reason #1.  Because true love, between two people, should be celebrated in their own, unique love languages, every day of the year. Not only when society dictates that they should tell someone that they love them.  (Gentleman once a year expression is NOT acceptable.  And ladies, you should never settle for someone who can only express themselves one time a year… and…vice versa.)

If you have more reasons, I would love to hear them!  But regardless of my feelings about this day, I do believe that expressions of love are important. VERY important.  So remember today, and tomorrow, and each day after, to tell the ones you love how much they mean to you.  And buy them something tomorrow.  It’ll be 50-75% off.  😉

XOXO,

BH&T

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Starfish Excavator

I tattooed it.  Literally put it on my body in a permanent fashion.

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Went through the pain and the swelling.  I sat through the hour session with only one thought running through my head, “Breathe.”  I didn’t remember any of my other tattoos hurting this bad and I swore that if anyone ever asked if they should get a foot tattoo,  I’d talk them out of it.

But then it healed…

The swelling went away…

Summer passed and winter came, and along with the cold came shoes.

With those shoes a lesson, that I once thought important enough to tattoo on my body, was buried.

I think all lessons in life are like that.  We think we have learned something.  We take it to heart, and for a moment it changes everything.  We are better for the lesson we learned.  Other lives are too.  Then a season changes, and those “shoes” come out, and something we used to look at everyday becomes hidden.  We forget the pain it took to learn the lesson, or the sacrifices that imprinted them on our brains.

But sometimes miracles happen.  A chance to uncover old lessons by taking our “shoes” off.  I recently shed my shoes in Costa Rica.  The lesson uncovered?

No task is too small, no person unimportant.

You see sometimes I wonder what my role in life is.  I know that there is a specific path for me, something that God created just for me to do, but I sometimes get so scared that I am going to miss the path, I stop looking.  I sort of sit down and challenge God to reveal something to me before I keep walking.

Or I pout.  I say, “Well God, I don’t see how any of this really matters.  When I am I going to “graduate.”

I think He laughs, and says, “As soon as you stop sitting down half way through the lesson.  We could have already been there.”

And then, and I am blessed He continues to be merciful with my childlike behavior, He send a miracle.   Little reminders, that work as huge excavators, digging up memories of long buried lessons.  In Costa Rica I found a little starfish “excavator.”

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For me starfish have long been a symbol.   They symbolize the reality that, “No task is too small, no person unimportant.”  What may not seem like a big deal to some, may be the very thing that saves another’s life.  Like the starfish I found.  I had the opportunity to place them back in the ocean instead of leaving them to be fried on the high tide rocks.

I didn’t change the world, and it took barely any effort on my part, but to that starfish, it was life giving.   Translate that into your everyday life and you could be a life giving source to someone just by reaching out your hand and helping them to the other side.   Small actions have huge implications.

I needed to be reminded that my small actions had bigger implications.  Maybe you need to be reminded of that too.  Out stretched hands change the world, smiles change the world, tiny acts of kindness can change the world.  You can create a ripple that reaches far beyond your physical grasp.

No task is too small, no person unimportant. 

Create a ripple today,

BH&T